Traffic Signs

I get along with most traffic signs. I stop at the stop ones, yield at the yield ones and move over when a sign tells me my lane’s going to end. It took a while to get used to the international ones like the red circle one with the white bar that essentially tells me I’m not welcome on whatever road or driveway its posted in or the red circle one with the diagonal line that tells me not to do something or if I am doing it to quit before I get in the line of sight of the next cop or state patrol trooper.

The signs I have a little trouble with are the warning signs – the yellow square one tipped on end to look like a diamond shape. The ones that tell you to slow down for the next curve can usually be ignored. At least I do. Most of the time, I find I can go 15mph over what the sign suggests without much effect. At 20mph centrifugal force reminds me why I wear a seat belt. 25mph over gives a little screech to the back tire and adds a little pizzazz to the driving experience. Once in a while the sign is actually serious. I find most of the ones that recommend 15mph for a right angle turn mean that at 16mph you’re going to jump the ditch and plow into the tree that was planted to discourage both the centrifugal force and pizzazz experience.

The one warning sign I do not understand, though, is the one that says Bump. I’m not talking about the temporary ones road crew put up at construction sites where they’ve torn out half the road so you get the idea they’re doing something. I’m talking about the ones that are permanently planted along road ways and highways that give you the thought that if you hit it at normal traffic speed your vehicle will be airborne. Mine never has. In fact, I find the actual bump anticlimactic. I gear up for it, brace the steering wheel and, maybe, tap the gas pedal a little. The actual bump doesn’t even give the suspension a good workout. Maybe I expect too much. Sometimes I forget I’m driving a vehicle and not flying an F4 Phantom. There are days, though, when I would like to.